Between a Soft and a Hard Place General Nonsense 12 MAR 2008

Bouncy BedI’m generally a sucker for slightly softer mattresses than what is the norm, preferring to sink into my bed for a good night’s rest, rather than forcing myself flat over a concrete slab. However, the mattress must not be so soft and infirm that you form an actual imprint in the bed, nor should you automatically roll into the middle thanks to the automatic ‘sag’ feature found in older model mattresses.

By far the hardest bed I have ever had to sleep on has to be that bed from hell at The Boulders B&B in Oudtshoorn. It made me so uncomfortable that I was actually forced to get up in the middle of the night and seek comfort by curling up on the nearby couch, much to the amusement of Chantelle of course.

Last weekend’s trip to Franskraal yielded a bed that was not quite as bad as that, but it was still pretty hard, so much so that if I bounced a tennis ball off it I would have been in danger of shattering the glass window next to it. Thankfully though I managed to somehow fall asleep on it, only waking up once with an extremely pained shoulder that forced me to roll onto my stomach, thereby abandoning Chantelle, and sleep with my arms thrust out in front of me in the patented “Superman Lie” in order to relieve the pain.

So as you can imagine, I was more than pleased on my return to spend Sunday night in my own bed once more, sinking into its soft confines in a state of sheer sleep-induced bliss…

…only to wake up 3 am with a collarbone that felt broken and an urge to scream like a little girl (I had to bite my tongue not to wake Chantelle up. Instead, I got up and pranced around the living room like a mad nutter).

It would seem that I really should be a mattress monogamous man and drag the thing around with me instead of sleeping around with all these one night stand mattresses.

So, does anyone know how to fit a roof rack on an ’97 Jetta then? O.o

About Craig Lotter

South African software architect and developer at Touchwork. Husband to a cupcake baker and father to two little girls. I don't have time for myself any more.