Lotion in the Ocean General Nonsense 20 FEB 2009

Skin Lotion on HandRight. So I’ve already ranted about blue dolphin tattoos on men at gym, meaning that next up is another strange trend that seems to have gripped (well perhaps not gripped because I imagine it to be quite slippery) at least 70% of the male gym population.

Skin lotion.

I mean WTF? What’s happened to the Malboro-smoking, don’t give a fuck, man’s man, the kind of man who showers only once a week and even that’s only when he wants to get some loving out of a woman?

Have men degenerated so far as to the point where if they don’t rub on some ridiculously expensive lotion that stepping out into the sun may just cause them to shrivel up and die? Or is it perhaps a secretive penis enlarging cream that when applied to the thighs and arms makes everything else seem bigger?

I don’t know. Personally I can’t stand it. Smearing cream all over your body, when not for medical purposes just makes you look like a complete wally, and a girly wally at that. Come on man, be a bit manly again!

(Needless to say, I do not moisturise, tenderise or buff puff anything unless it’s asking for it! Grrr…)

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About Craig Lotter

South African software architect and developer at Touchwork. Husband to a cupcake baker and father to two little girls. I don't have time for myself any more.