Jetta Jameson Clutches Me Once Again [Part 1] My Life 03 FEB 2010

Oh noes, Jetta Jameson has gone and done it again. My lifelong partner has decided to once more say bye bye to her clutch and in doing so, leave me stranded all the way out in Westlake at the Steenberg Virgin Active parking lot. Sigh.

It all unfolded on Monday evening, after a late day at the office due to another job interview I was part of (Touchwork is hiring again in case you’re interested). Although already too late for karate practice, I was nevertheless keen to get home sooner than later in anticipation of a great meal prepared by Chantelle at the start of her healthy eating campaign, and after offering a lift to Dave whose car was funnily enough currently sitting in the shop, went to collect Jetta Jameson from the Virgin Active’s basement.

With bags all packed and ready for Dave, I eased Jetta up the ramp and as I turned up the last corner and started heading for daylight and those annoying access booms just up ahead, all of a sudden the clutch jumped inwards, propelled my foot forwards and yanked out a well-placed “fuck” from my mouth, all at the same time.

Luckily I was stuck in first and so continued my painful crawl up the ramp, with me leaning forward out of my open window frantically waving my access disc around in the hopes I could trigger the boom to lift before Jetta’s nose reached it. I did.

However, I wasn’t quite out of the woods yet. Now in a busy cul-de-sac with no where to pull to the side of the road, I opted to swing right, past an astonished and quite bewildered Dave, heading straight for Virgin Active’s outside parking, which yes, is also protected by a boom. This time my leaning out the window with the access disc didn’t quite work out and I was forced to shut her down just before she plowed into the boom, stopping literally just with a centimetre or two to spare!

I tentatively opened the boom and started her in first, where she jolted forward to life and edged through the boom, thankfully missing it on the way in. Now desperately scanning for an open space in what is quite frankly an almost always busy parking lot, I was rewarded with a huge stroke of luck as I spotted an open spot directly ahead of me, allowing me to guide Jetta safely home and put her to rest within its snuggly confines.

By this stage Dave was rather confused, and as I grabbed the valuables and my gym stuff out of the car, I explained to him the dilemma and as such, sent him on his way in search of train in order to make his own way home. I on the other hand grabbed my phone and phoned my lifeline, Chantelle, who just so happened to have gotten home minutes earlier, having just completed her epic grocery shopping trip.

Eager to help, we hatched up a rescue plan and happy in the knowledge that help was now on its way, I made my way back to the office to enjoy a nice cup of coffee and some toast with peanut butter on. Needless to say, this didn’t change the fact that I was still feeling quite grumpy. (Actually, grumpy is probably too nice a way of putting the mood I was in!)

Unfortunately for me though, in my infinite stupidity I had managed to slightly screw up the directions I had given Chantelle and after the allotted time had passed and she still hadn’t arrived, I realised my mistake and phoned her to find her well on her way all the way through to Wynberg. She wasn’t impressed, I was grumpy, and my repaired directions proved to be pretty inaccurate too, meaning that more than one phone call had to be directed between the two of us, with the end result of her only arriving at around 19:15 to pick a rather tired and stressed Craig, sitting all alone on the sidewalk, up.

The drive home back to Gordon’s Bay was a pretty silent affair, but we did at least manage to bash out a plan that involved Monty and Cheryl coming through to Westlake where Monty and I would tow the car back to Disa Auto Services in Strand while Cheryl would bring back Chantelle’s car which I would borrow after dropping her off at work on her split shift in the morning.

Still, this didn’t really improve my mood and as such our trip home took a slight detour as Chantelle treated me to a Spur burger to try and cheer me up.

Burger was good, but Castle draught was better. Mood not all that better, still grumpy, but at least all the relevant phone conversations and smses were handled.

Slept surprisingly well though…

[End Part 1]

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About Craig Lotter

South African software architect and developer at Touchwork. Husband to a cupcake baker and father to two little girls. I don't have time for myself any more.

  • Ryan

    I guess we know how this story is going to have to finally end…with a silver bullet through jetta jameson’s heart – and the search for a new car, thing is you might struggle to find a new porn star name to go with getz that everyone will get

  • Hey, Genna Getz works for me…

  • Ryan

    Tru dat

  • You dig?

  • Chantelle

    Could I please have the honour of putting that silver bullet through Jetta Jameson’s heart, I vote for Genna Getz anyday! :)

  • Not a chance my bokkie – seeing as I’ve contact the mechanic to do a service on her while she remains in his care, means she needs to live that little bit longer…

  • Karl

    Save the Jetta :D

  • We should start a rally to try and save Jetta from the bloodthirsty Chantelle! :)