Supplement Me My Life 04 OCT 2011

Any man who has ever been in a relationship with a woman will know that they nag. They fixate on something and then just go on and on about it, battering away at your resolve and slowly chipping away at your defenses until it finally reaches a point that you simply cave in and let them get their way, just so that you can have a moment’s peace and escape the constant exasperation that comes from their constant harping on over the subject at hand.

And thus I now take weight loss supplements.

Despite the fact that I absolutely DESPISE putting any sort of chemical concoction into my body whatsoever, and in particular have an absolute thing against weight loss products and body building supplements in general, Chantelle has now successfully persuaded me to join her in a programme that involves me popping at least eight capsules of this stuff a day!

First up on my plate is Biogen CAL 3000 Fat Burner, of which I need to ingest two gel capsules twice daily after every meal. Apparently this stuff is meant to mobilize areas of stored fat to be burned as energy by the body, as well as prevent storage of fat.

Next is the well known USN Phedra-Cut Ultra XT, of which I also need to ingest two capsules twice daily before each exercise session or meal. According to the documentation, this one is a multi-phase fat loss activator which burns body fat, suppresses appetite and boosts energy – and also happens to be packed with far more stimulants than what I’m comfortable with.

(I blame the Expresso morning show and its constant bombardment of USN-sponsored inserts for this turn of events in my life, by the way.)

But I guess Chantelle has a point. I’ve maintained an excellent exercise routine and a decent eating regime for well over a year now, and have absolutely nothing to show for it other than a constant weight and waistline measurement, which just happens to be a particularly fat number. I also simply don’t have the time or inclination to work even harder to actually lose weight, meaning that I now need to try something else. So despite the fact that I’m completely against this, I have succumbed to her nagging and have started the programme, and seeing that thus far I haven’t died, had an heart attack, or experienced erectile dysfunction just yet, I guess I’ll stick with it for a bit.

(But damn, this stuff is pretty expensive I feel the necessity to add!)

Anyway, I suppose I have nothing to lose and everything to gain, though in this particular instance perhaps it should read everything to lose and everything to gain! ;)

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About Craig Lotter

Software developer, husband and dad to two little girls. Writer behind An Exploring South African. I don't have time for myself any more.