The Tragedy of Owning White Couches My Life 13 SEP 2012

I had to laugh, but in a crying way last night. Back in 2010 we were very excited to welcome our brand spanking new, super squishy (and expensive) couches from Coricraft into our home. Chantelle had won our epic battle on the shop floor, and so we ended up with sparkly white, Kirsty, a big oversized unit which admittedly does look super smart wherever you plonk it down.

Anyway, one of the battles we had on the shop floor had been around preferred colour, and in the end, Chantelle convinced me that the off-white would look the best in our current apartment at the time, and that keeping the couches clean wouldn’t be a problem because of the slipcovers which allow for fairly easy cleaning.

Anyway, fast forward a couple of years, add in some cats and now a toddler, you can well imagine that keeping the couches sparkly clean is a nigh impossible task – so much so that the couches are almost permanently draped in some or other cover in the hopes to limit muddy paw prints or misplaced Purity lips. And although removing the slip covers from the couch is actually pretty easy – in other words making washing the couches pretty simple, getting the damn things back on again is easier said than done, thanks to bull denim’s propensity to ever so slightly shrink in the wash!

Right, so with the background now covered, let’s get into just why I had to laughing, in a crying way, last night. So a few weeks ago Chantelle accidentally bumped over my half drunk cup of coffee, spilling it over the couch in braai room. A tragedy needless to say. Then a few days later, after an epic baking session that had lasted well into the early morning hours, she managed to fall asleep with a cup of coffee in her hand – and promptly spilled it all over the couch in the lounge.

With no other choice, we undressed the couches and sent the cushions and slipcovers off to the laundry, got them back nice and (fairly) clean, and then proceeded to swear and sweat as we redressed the couches on Tuesday evening.

Now poor little Jessica has not been feeling well at all for this entire week, so much so that she skipped school on Tuesday, staying at home with Chantelle who was also off sick, as well as on Wednesday where Monty and Cheryl graciously agreed to help us out by driving through to look after the 3 times a day nebulized Jessica.

Anyway, after a long day at work, and with a sick Chantelle and a restless Jessie who wouldn’t go to bed, the three of us were sitting on the couch in the braai room around 20:30, watching some Avatar, when wouldn’t you know it, Jessica started vomiting, huge milky volumes all over the newly washed couch!

So yes, needless to say, I couldn’t help but laugh, in a crying way last night. Sigh, off to the laundromat we go…

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About Craig Lotter

South African software architect and developer at Touchwork. Husband to a cupcake baker and father to two little girls. I don't have time for myself any more.