How do you get an overweight, fully grown adult man to smoothly turn and launch himself feet first out of the bed in a single movement, hit the ground at full tilt before sprinting across the house (in this case an admittedly small one), bashing in through a closed door, and reaching the intended target in less than a second, a good handful of long seconds before the wife can even think of arriving on the scene?
Just make the baby set off the Angelcare sleep monitor alarm in the middle of the night!
Big sigh of relief though, a false alarm once again (not that this normally happens mind you). I had visions of giving Jessie a couple of mighty big shakes in her slumber sack to get her breathing again, and I don’t think C would have been all that impressed with my baby saving technique.
Still, wifey was mightily impressed with my burning quick feet – particularly when taking into account the extra wind drag factor that stems from the fact that I tend to sleep naked more often than not…