Tag Archives: teacher

Joke Factory: Lecturing Jokes & other Funny Stuff 01 FEB 2013

First day of university lectures for Psychology 101, and there standing in the main lecture hall is Professor Clarke, about to greet his new class.

He stands in front of the large group and poses a question:

“Would everyone who thinks that either he or she is stupid, please stand up?”

After a minute or so of silence, a young man stood up.

“Well, hello there sir. So, do you actually believe that you’re currently sitting on the lower levels of the intelligence scale then?” asked the professor.

Without so much as a blink, the student replied, “No sir. I just didn’t want to see you standing there all by yourself…”

Joke Factory: Do I know You? Jokes & other Funny Stuff 10 FEB 2012

A man standing in line at a check out counter of a grocery store was very surprised when a very attractive woman behind him tapped him on the shoulder and said in a very friendly voice, “Hello!”

Not recognising her even in the slightest, he turned back at her and gave her the old “who are you?” slightly confused look.

Noticing his puzzlement, the woman apologized, saying that when she had first seen him, he had looked like the father of one of her children, and with that, she walked out of the store.

Dumbfounded at this rather peculiar display, the guy couldn’t help but mutter to himself, “What the heck is this the world coming to? Such an attractive young woman unable to keep track of who the fathers of her very own children are!”

Then a far more disturbing thought hit him like a freight train. He doesn’t remember her now, but MAYBE, just maybe, during one of those wild parties back when he was still in college…

Rushing out of the store, he caught up to her in the parking lot, grabbed her by the shoulder and spun her around, asking in a very earnest voice, and with very big eyes, “I’m sorry, but are you perhaps that girl I met back at a party when we were still in college, the one where we got really, really drunk and had wild crazy sex on the pool table in front of everyone?”

“No”, she replied, a horrified look spreading across her face. “I’m your son’s second grade teacher!”

Joke Factory: Riding Tall Jokes & other Funny Stuff 27 MAY 2011

A group of 3rd, 4th and 5th graders, accompanied by two female teachers, went on a field trip to the local racetrack to learn about thoroughbred horses and the supporting industry – but mostly to see the horses of course!

When it was time to take the children to the bathroom, it was decided that the girls would go with one teacher and the boys would go with the other. The teacher assigned to the boys was waiting outside the men’s room when one of the boys came out and told her that none of them could reach the urinal.

Having no other real option available to her, she went inside, helped the boys with their pants, and began hoisting the little boys up one by one, holding on to their ‘wee-wees’ to direct the flow away from their clothes.

As she lifted the final one, she couldn’t help but notice that he was unusually well endowed. Trying not to show that she was staring, the teacher said, “You must be in the 5th grade.”

“No, ma’am”, he replied.

“I’m riding Bold Silvano in the seventh race, but I do appreciate your help.”