I learned two things last night:
1. Why I don’t run a guesthouse and
2. There really isnt anything on late night television
My usual visit to C last night took a little twist when she said that she was still waiting for a guest to check in after I had finally arrived at the guesthouse (around 20:30 – sorry for being a little late snuggles!). So we did our usual hanging about, had a good laugh at one of the guests that returned to the guesthouse after having one too many, and fielded a phone call informing us that the errant guest was now only slated to check in round 23:30 the evening.
Now C had a particularly busy day and I could see she was really tired, so I told her to go take a nice warm bath and go to bed – Ill take over for her and wait for this guest to arrive – major brownie points I tell you ;)
Armed with the DSTV remote control I made myself comfortable and began with one of my favourite pastimes, namely flicking through every single channel on DSTV, including the foreign language ones (This was probably around 22:00 or 22:30 I guess). Now as exciting as this is, I cant do it all night, so I switched into the find something to watch mode. Bugger. There were no good movies on (and I really didnt feel like watching the foreign language movie about gay film producers or something like that) and the sports channels had nothing decent showing apart from reruns. I watched some gymnastics for a while but there are only so many moments of jealousy I can endure while watching people effortlessly do things mortal men should just not be capable of doing. And Chelsea TV? Barca TV? Are they kidding me? ESPN was a loss as well.
Dont get me started on the crap that was on the free to air channels. The SABC – and ETV channels were scraping the barrel again. Documentary-wise there was bugger all on and trying to watch the Adult Swim segments on Go TV just proved that Adult Humour Cartoons really are as stupid as what theyre animated. MTV was doing everything but music as per usual and Id seen the samurai jack episodes on Cartoon Network a million times before. MK89 actually wasnt all that bad – if you cut out all of the idiot Afrikaans presenters on it and closed your eyes at anything non-musical showing on it. I caught a Seether music video which was a nice treat – I liked that even if I think Shaun Welgemoed is an idiot for changing his name to Morgan for greater American audience acceptance. The only acceptance he’s got was into rehab.
Actually my pick of the evening came from the Chinese TV channel (CCTV or something like that) where a woman was being silly and giving a tour around some or other Chinese region in passable yet simultaneously amusing English.
By the way, the bugger of guest still had not arrived.
So my channel hopping in the freezing cold under a thin little blanket in the lounge endured on until I finally decided to get up for a toilet break at 00:30 in the morning. And as Murphys Law would have it, the minute I started relieving myself the bloody phone went off, leaving me no choice but to wet my underpants and hurry back to silence the damn thing and let the guest in, all with a big inviting white smile of course!
My mission complete, I slipped into bed for a well-deserved slumber, now quite secure in the knowledge that:
1. I will never take up managing my own guesthouse in the future and
2. to invest in a portable gaming system.