Things to do in Cape Town, the Helderberg, and the Cape Winelands

Tag doctor

Joke Factory: Depressingly Dangerous Food

A doctor was addressing a large audience in Cape Town: “The choice of food that we put into our stomachs these days is sometimes quite literally enough to us given enough time”. “Red meat is awful, soft drinks corrode your… Continue Reading →

The House of C 024: Dealing with Arseholes

It’s a shitty job, and you’ll probably end up the butt of all your friends’ jokes, but hey, work is work – and besides, someone has to do it. To be honest, I was a bit torn whether to go… Continue Reading →

Joke Factory: Not Your Standard STD

Steve and Fiona were making passionate love in Steve’s Volkswagen Kombi van when suddenly Fiona, being a bit on the kinky side, yelled out “Oh you dirty boy, whip me, whip me!!” Steve, not wanting to pass up this unique… Continue Reading →

Joke Factory: The Rectal Thermometer and the Pen

A doctor stepped into a bank.

Joke Factory: The Quick Retort

The waiting room was filled with patients and as he approached the receptionist’s desk, he noticed that the receptionist was a rather large, unfriendly woman who looked far too much like a Sumo wrestler for his liking.

Infant Ill

Shame, so little Jessica is sick for the first real time in her life, with a good and proper ear, nose and throat infection. She started showing symptoms on Monday, and although our own thermometers didn’t indicate a fever (which have now shown to be rather inaccurate and thus actually quite useless), our little darling was wheezing away, exhibiting shallow breathing, being very congested, releasing lots of yellow snot (the colour is what makes it an indication of sickness by the way) and of course just being in lots and lots of discomfort with the heart-breaking big crocodile tears.

Joke Factory: The Doctor needs a Sample

An elderly gentleman goes in for his annual check-up. The doctor finishes his examination and then beckons to the old man to join his wife who had accompanied him, back at his desk.

Craig Goes to the Doctor

I don’t do doctors. Much to Chantelle’s chagrin of course. I really only drag myself there if I absolutely, absolutely have to – and even then that seldom happens! Of course this does mean that I don’t yet have a house doctor here in Gordon’s Bay, despite having lived in the town for almost two years now!

Sample Please

I despise going to the doctor or hospital, simple as that. I always leave it right until I am half dead and absolutely have to go, and then usually only at the bequest of my loved ones.

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