Tag Archives: marriage

Tarryn and Robert Announce their Marriage (2015-10-10) Photo Gallery 14 OCT 2015

The Bakesh Food and Wine restaurant in Durbanville seems quite a nice little place to stop for a bite to eat, but now thanks to Rob and Tarryn, it will forever be associated with something much more special.

You see, last weekend we were invited to a hush hush, secret surprise lunch organised by Rob, where on arrival the two of them announced that they had secretly got married three days earlier in Paarl.

Needless to say, there was a moment of stunned silence for both the Botha and Montgomery parents, followed by a LOT of jubilation and tears.

IMG_20151010_172525 mr and mrs montgomery cutting the cake

Congratulations Rob and Tarryn – may this be the start of a wonderful life together! :)

P.S. It was a good lunch.

Joke Factory: Depressingly Dangerous Food Jokes & other Funny Stuff 04 APR 2013

A doctor was addressing a large audience in Cape Town:

“The choice of food that we put into our stomachs these days is sometimes quite literally enough to us given enough time”.

“Red meat is awful, soft drinks corrode your stomach lining, Chinese food is loaded with MSG, high fat diets can be disastrous, and none of us realizes the long term harm caused by the germs in our very drinking water. ”

“However, above all this, there is still one food choice that is the most dangerous of all, and we all have, or will, eat it.”

Pausing for effect, the doctor continued with, “So, does anyone have an idea as to what this food choice is that can cause so much grief and suffering over such an extended period of time after eating it?”

After several seconds of quiet, a wrinkled 75-year-old man in the front row slowly raised his hand, and softly said, “Wedding cake.”

Joke Factory: That’s One Way to Secure the Votes Jokes & other Funny Stuff 03 FEB 2012

An elderly couple was having dinner one evening when the husband reached across the table, took his wife’s hand in his and said, “Emma, soon we will be married 50 years, and there’s something I have to know. In all of these 50 years, have you ever been unfaithful to me?”

Emma replied, “Well Herman, I have to be honest with you too dear. Yes, I’ve been unfaithful to you three times during these 50 years, but always for a good reason.”

Hurt by his wife’s sudden and unexpected confession, Herman managed to stay composed and said, “I never suspected a thing. Could you perhaps please tell me just what you mean by ‘good reason’?”

Emma said, “The first time was shortly after we were married, and we were about to lose our little house because we couldn’t pay the mortgage. Do you remember that one evening I went to see the banker and the next day he notified you that the loan would be extended?”

Herman recalled the visit to the banker and said, “Oh. But I can forgive you for that my dear, after all, you saved our home. And the second time?”

Emma asked, “Do you remember when you were so sick and we didn’t have the money to pay for the heart surgery you needed? Well, I went to see your doctor one night and, if you recall, he did the surgery at no charge.”

“I recall that,” replied Herman tearfully, “And again you did it to save my life, so of course I can forgive you for that. Now tell me about the third time.”

“All right,” Emma said. “So do you remember when you ran for president of the synagogue, and you needed 73 more votes to win?”

The Beautiful Fairytale for Men Jokes & other Funny Stuff 16 SEP 2009

Once upon a time, a guy asked a girl “Will you marry me?”

The girl said, “NO!”

And the guy lived happily ever after and rode motorcycles and went fishing and hunting and played golf a lot and drank beer and scotch and had money in the bank and left the toilet seat up and farted whenever he wanted.

The End.

(Source: The Montgomery Clan!)

In the Dog Box General Nonsense 04 NOV 2007

Man, you know your marriage is in trouble when this happens to you! :(

Straight out of the lovely Great Britain, apparently a Scottish woman has just managed to avoid a prison sentence after she admitted to the charge that she had in fact put dog poo in her husband’s curry.

Apparently their marriage had broken down and Jill Martin, 47, took this action as a revenge attack, making her husband the tainted supper and then bursting out laughing when he started to eat it. He must have felt a right turd there and then I guess.

She escaped punishment by painting a dark portrait of her life, saying that she had taken action to deal with an alcohol problem and …over a period of years felt undermined by her partner and had very low self-esteem’.

The couple had been married for 21 years, but now (not that surprisingly I guess) the divorce proceedings are under way.

garnished bowl of curry

Well, I guess it could have been worse for the hapless husband. She could have made some nice slimy worm spaghetti to go with that curry!

What’s it worth? Jokes & other Funny Stuff 24 AUG 2007

cartoon bride looking in mirror at her wedding dressSome jokes are too good to be passed up. This is one of them :)

A man walks into his bedroom and sees his wife packing a suitcase. –

He asks, “What are you doing?”
She answers, “I’m moving to London. I heard prostitutes there get paid $400 for doing what I do for you for free.”

Later that night, on her way out, the wife walks into the bedroom and sees her husband packing his suitcase.

When she asks him where he’s going, he replies, “I’m coming too, I want to see how you live on $800 a year.

A true reflection of married life eh? ;)